Gutter Snap

I glanced at my legs hovering over puffy clouds. I was hanging from a gutter, high above the world, with one arm. Things could not get worse. Reeeeeeeek. My heart dropped as I felt myself sink even further. The gutter was now hanging on by a thread. I looked down again. I saw the long, thick chain. It was a huge risk, but it was my only option. I swung my legs as close to the chain as I could. VOOM. Before I had the chance to jump, the gutter snapped off the roof. I free feel for some time. Luckily the chain is a few miles long. After falling for what felt like an eternity I grabbed hold of the chain with one tired arm. I then hoisted myself up. This was my time, and I would complete my mission, damn it. I untied my red hood and cape, and fastened it securely to the chain. This was my sail, and I was the captain.

Olivia's Exit

Unfortunately, Olivia's exit out of the attic was not a pleasant one. The wind violently pushed her forward causing her to tumble down the stairs. Bruised and dazed, she came to her feet only to fall once more this time down a marble staircase. The Wellness Center continued to shake. Olivia crept along the walls, trying her best to stand up straight. She noticed in this ivory colored hallway there were no doors or windows, but only outlines of ones done in blue crayon. Where these plans yet to be materialized? She wondered to herself. She leaned against one of the door outlines only to have the wall collapse behind her. She fell backwards into a dark room filled with boxes of all sizes and shapes.

Gutter Punk

Ever do something you immediately regret  after? I'm having one of those moments right now. I came up with the brilliant idea of going outside and hoisting a sail to the roof. Should have dawned on me that the winds are much more violent and destructive outside. I was only half way out the window. The wind pulled me out the rest of the way out. I tumbled down the upside down roof, trying in vain to grab a hold of anything. Luckily, I was cradled in  a small gap between a partially outstretched gutter and the roof. I wasn't about to celebrate though because I knew this wasn't a secure spot. I moved ever so slowly. I did not want to make this a bigger problem. I gradually shifted my weight. I thought I was doing well until I witnessed all the screws pop out around me. The gutter slid out more which caused me fall backwards. Thankfully, I was able to latch on to the gutter with one free hand. However, the gutter slid out even more, and I was now dangling in the middle of the sky. I sure hope Olivia's mission is going much smoother.

Attic

The anchor chain brought us to a small, oval - shaped, attic widow. I'm guessing that is what Todd was referring to when he talked about an alternative entrance. However, the window is even smaller than the chimney. There is no possible Barry could have fit through. We push the window open and squeeze in. Just like the chimney entrance we are right side up when get in, and just like the chimney entrance it is not adorned with anything. There isn't even old boxes filled with Christmas decorations like what one would normally find in an attic. Just us and creaky floor boards. Olivia calls out Todd's name. There is no response. "Where do you think he is?" I ask. Olivia shrugs. "He could be anywhere." We creep though the attic trying to find the exit. As we are a mere feet away from the attic latch, the Wellness Center shakes, throwing us against the wall. "What was that?" Olivia asks, grasping her neck. "Gust of wind." I attempt to leave through the window. Olivia pulls me back. "What are you doing?" "The wind is only going to get worse. I'm going to go out there and make a sail. You find Todd."

Fourth Wall Letter

The higher we climbed, the more difficult it was to hang on. The winds pushed us violently back and forth. "We have to keep going." Olivia urges. I knew she was right. I knew that staying still could do no good, but at that moment a paper airplane caught my attention. It flew around my head like an insect. Olivia, seeing that I was distracted, snatched it away. "Hey." She shouted, whiling opening it up. "It's a letter from your sister." "Well that's nice. What does it say?" I ask. Olivia skims it over. "It says that this blog that we're in right now is nominated for some award." "No kidding?" "Yeah, it looks like it is a fun way for other writers to branch out and connect." "That's a good idea. Is there anything we have to do?"  "Not really. Is there anyone you want to pass this along to though?" "Right off the bat I can think of Antonio Soriano @antoniosoriano.com. He's a great musician." Olivia nods her head in agreement. "Anyone else?" "There is this guy who does old comic book reviews. It's called retrocomicreviews."  I think for a moment. "Hmm that's only two." "That's ok, we can always edit this thing later." "So, is that all then?" I ask. "Almost, there's a few questions for you. Here I'll give you the letter."

1) Why do you blog?
Well, I guess the simplest way to explain it is that I have so many ideas floating around in my brain. I have to do something with them. The nice thing about blogging is that there is an audience for just about everything. Nothing is too strange or out there. Right now I want to stretch my imagination as far as I possibly can.


2) Who is your favorite author?
Hard question, but I would have to say that Roald Dahl would be up there. His books are always so adventurous and picturesque.

3) What is your favorite childhood memory?
When I was six my older siblings wanted me to dress up as Peter Pan for Halloween. It would fit their theme if I did. ( They went as Tiger Lilly and a Pirate.) But I wanted to go as a Lion, and wasn't going to back down. So, I went as an adorable lion, and I like to think we got a decent amount of candy that year because of it.

4) Who has been your most influential person in your life? Why?
I'm sure this may  disappoint some, and I'm not trying to be diplomatic, but I don't think I could possibly name one person or thing. From my immediate family, to random people I meet on walks to Tim Burton movies they have all shaped the way I write in some way or another.

5) What would an ideal vacation/ get away look like?
I've always been drawn to the East coast. I'd like to Visit Main. I think it would be pretty.

6) What is one thing you do exceptionally well , but can't often talk about it because it would seem like bragging? 
I am quite good at identifying voices from commercials or cartoons. I usually can get it right away, but sometimes I have to listen for a few minutes.

7) What is your favorite food?
It is a toss up between mashed potatoes and apple pancakes. Two  different worlds, but I like them both so much that it is a tie.

8) Have you ever practiced an acceptance speech in the mirror, and if so what was the award that you accepted?
I have actually. Not in a while, but yes. I believe it was an award for Best Original Screenplay. I went on and I and on. I think even  in my mind the orchestra attempted to drown me out. So, I shouted above them,

9) What makes you laugh?
I am a sucker for a good pun. The cheesier the better.

10) What is something you would like to see happen in your lifetime?
This is something I have thought about long and hard. It's 2016, and it baffles why this has not yet come into being. We have the technology and the resources. It is time once and for all to make edible Easter grass a reality. Think about it? With edible Easter grass you will not have to worry about discovering it months later because it will be far too tasty. I think we all deserve this.

I smiled to myself as I answered the last question out loud. No it is my turn to ask the questions.
Why blog?
What was your biggest inspiration?
Do you have a favorite book/ author?
If you had all the money in the world what would you do?
What is your favorite animal?
What is your favorite dish?
If you could be any literary character who would you be?
What makes you laugh?
What is your favorite childhood memory
What would you like to see happen within your life?Kristinwagner@wordpress

Anchor's Away

There was a long chain that connected  to the bottom of the Wellness Center on one end, and to an anchor that was buried under clouds on the other end. The chain was enormous. It was about 3 feet wide. Cutting it wouldn't be an easy task. "If I had my blow torch we could melt those chains in no time." The Cook thinks out loud. "You have a blow torch?" I ask, excitedly. "Yes. I use it for some dishes. It's in the kitchen though, and I have no idea where that is." "A lot of good that does us." I say under my breath. Olivia kneels down. She begins to brush away some clouds. "What are you doing?" I ask. "I want to unbury the anchor." "That's not a bad idea. At least then we'd know what we're dealing with." I say. The three of us dig through the clouds with our hands. There are many thick, cotton - like layers. The clouds bend, but they don't break. So we have to pull them out slowly and surely bit by bit, and place them to the side. Finally we unearth (or uncloud) the anchor. It is a massive, rusty anchor about 5 feet in height. The cook whistles. "That'll do it. What should we do now?" Before either of us has a chance to explain, the anchor begins to sway back and forth. "I don't think we have to do anything more." Olivia says, glancing at the anchor that is lifting off the ground. Olivia and I jump on to the anchor. "Where are you going?" The Cook shouts. "We have to take care of Todd now. We don't want him getting hurt." Olivia shouts back. "But what about me?" He asks.  "You'll be fine. The clouds will follow us, and if they don't we'll be be back." We watched the Cook become smaller and smaller as we ascend into the sky.

Whisky and Woes

Climbing the inside of the chimney proved much easier the second time around. The Cook even seemed to enjoy the whimsical entrance. He laughed and joked the whole way up. However, as soon as we entered the the Wellness Center, his attitude changed to annoyance. He repeatedly shouted "Where is that bastard?!" and "I'll kill him!" To no one's surprise, Todd did not greet us with open arms and a smile. In fact he didn't come out at all. It was clear that Todd was hiding. Still, I took Olivia and the Cook to Todd's office. It had the same dirty, cramped feeling as before. The only difference was that Todd was missing this time. "Where is he?" The Cook growls. "I don't know." Olivia says. "When will he be back?" "I don't know." She repeats, but with more agitation in her voice. "You want to look around elsewhere?" I ask. The Cook does not respond. He sees a half empty bottle of whisky on the table. "No, that won't be necessary." "You sure?" The Cook doesn't respond. He instead rummages through drawers and cabinets. "You sure?" I repeat. He still does not respond. He continues to rummage until he finds three shot glasses. He places them on the table directly on top of the blueprint. "Oh, I'm sure. Right now I know this is the best place to be." He pours us each a shot. We say \cheers, clink our glasses, and down the shots in one gulp. It was strong whisky. It burned like nothing I ever tasted, and I'm sure I winced while drinking it because the Cook snickered to himself. "So, your place disappeared?" Olivia asks. The Cook nods. "Did it just vanish in thin air?" "Don't know. I went out for a walk one day, and then when I cam back I couldn't find it. I couldn't find anybody. I couldn't even find my garden. You know how bad that is?" "Does it mean people will go hungry?" I ask. "It means they'll starve." He clarifies. "How does a whole village disappear?" Olivia wonders. "I don't know, but ever since this building and the clouds came in I can't see anything." "What if we get rid of the clouds?" I suggest. The Cook shakes his head. "I think we can only get rid of the clouds by getting rid of the building, and I certainly don't want to blow it up." "Maybe we don't have to." Olivia replies. "What are you talking about?" He asks. "The building is tethered to the clouds by an anchor. If we found a way to cut the anchor perhaps the building will float away, and the clouds will come with it." The Cook's face suddenly becomes more relaxed. "That just might work."