Mr. and Mrs. Squirrel

Beaten and bloody, I rest my bones on branch high above the ground. Miraculously I do not fall off. I stay in the exact same spot through the rest of the night. I slowly open my eyes and try not to freak upon the realization of my current location. " Well isn't this a surprise?"  I hear the voice, but I can not easily turn around to greet this person.  I do attempt though. "No, no, don't get up. I'll come to you." I feel a critter skimper across my back and onto my torso. It's a squirrel wearing a bathrobe and holding a tiny cup of coffee. "Are you a squirrel?" He chuckles to himself. "It would appear so." Still exhausted, I try and rest my eyes again. "How did you get way up hear?" He asks me. "There was a storm last night." " I thought I heard something going on last night." The squirrel puts out his paw. "The name's Bob by the way, I live in this tree with the Mrs." I shake his paw.  "Nice to meet you." "Hey, why don't you come inside and get some breakfast with me and the wife?" "Oh, I couldn't"  "Nonsense Diane won't mind. Plus you look like you could use a good meal."  I glance at the small opening in the tree. "Thank you very much but I don't think I'd fit through." Bob inspects the opening. "I can correct this." Bob takes a sip of his coffee and hands the mug to me. He then skimpers off into the opening. A brief moment later he comes back with a little tool box. Bob opens the tool box and carefully reflects on each individual tool before picking out .... a pair of scissors? "Eureka! Just what I needed."  Bob uses the scissors on the opening and proceeds to cut the tree as if it were a thin piece of paper.  He then makes the opening even wider with his paws. "I fixed it." He says to me as he takes his coffee back and heads towards the opening. "Come on." He motions to me with his paw.  The opening was somehow a perfect fit for me. I walk through and there is this long spiral staircase. "Are you a hero?" He asks me. "I don't think so." "Then what's with the get up?" "I don't know. I just like it I guess." "Interesting." At the bottom of the stairs is a library.  What's interesting is that the books and shelves are all done to my scale.  They are not miniature as one would expect when being in a squirrel home. The very second we step foot in the library, Bob jolts off and climbs to the top of a bookshelf. " Do you like graphic novels?" He asks. "Yeah." "Here, have an anthology of Superman, Silver Surfer, and how about the Fantastic Four?" He throws the books off the shelves and into my arms. "You anxious." "A little bit." He throws me a book on anxiety. "You like philosophy?" "I love it."  "How about religion?"  " I think it is always good to know about that stuff." "Art? Music? Movies?" "Yes, yes, yes." Bob stops asking questions and starts throwing me books instead. He throws literally anything he can get his paws on. Existentialism, Quantum Physics, Eastern religion, Western religion, Mid-Western religion, History, Herstory, Psychology, anthropology, zoology, depression, oppression, suppression, Happiness, Wisdom, Joy of cooking, Joy of Sex, and a copy of When Harry Met Sally. I could barely walk. Let alone see. The stack of books was so high in front of me. "That should be enough." I hear him skimper away and carefully listen so I don't trip over anything. We walk into his kitchen. I have to duck down and some of the books don't make it through the door way. "Diane, we have a guest this morning." "Oh wonderful." I hear a female squirrel say. "Let me take those books for you." Bob quickly removes all of the books from my hands and places them in a blender. He does this by putting the corner of a book in his mouth and racing across the kitchen floor and up the cabinet. He is somehow as strong as a bull and quick as lightning. Going back and forth. Faster than ever.  "Sit down, Dear." Diane says to me as she pulls out a little chair from the little table. She is wearing bunny slippers with a bathrobe and her hair is in curlers. I sit at the chair, though it feels like I am sitting on air. "Bob, just what are you doing?" Diane asks as she works on the omelets. "I'm making one of my special smoothies." He says.  Diane's face lights up. "Oh you'll love this ." Bob blends all of the books full force.  Diane walks over to me and serves me an omelette  fresh from the skillet. I start to eat it. " Not just yet." Bob hurries over to me with his concoction of a drink and places it down. "Drink it first." He insists.  I stare at the drink, confused. "It's ok, reading is not the only way to get knowledge." He says to me. The drink is a weird color. A mix of every color in existence. All separate from each other, but existing at the same time. "Go on." He insists. Well if this is poison, then it's its poison. Only one way to know. Down the hatch it goes.