Toy Store

If one were able to find a microscope in a toy store , would it be any less effective than one found in a laboratory? Terrible question, let me rephrase that. If one were to find a microscope next to a snow cone machine....I'm not helping myself one bit. I'm in a toy store right now searching for a microscope. Not a perfect microscope, just a microscope. I don't need to see sub atomic particles, just the stuff on the surface. The stuff that can't be seen by the naked eye. My naked eyes. There is a possibility I'd be able to find a microscope somewhere within the confines of the Wellness Center. However, I need a break from that place. So, I'm in a whimsical toy shop. I will buy a cheap microscope that works, and then maybe some rock candy or a Pez dispenser.

The 'Ol Shield

Malory has her nose stuck in a mystery novel. She is too engrossed to see me. I could politely make my presence known, but I cannot pass up a golden opportunity to scare the crap out of someone. I shout "Boo." I don't yell it as loud as I possibly can, but I do shout it loud enough to get a decent reaction. Like a cartoon character, she throws her book in the air and nearly falls back in her chair. She grabs her chest. "You scared me." "Sorry, I didn't think that would happen." "What did you think would happen?" "I don't know. What were you reading?" Malory glances at her book on the floor. "It's a mystery set in Victorian times." She says. "That sounds fun." "It's different." "Different can be good." "I suppose. So, is it ok you're back?" She asks. "I think so. I haven't gotten in trouble yet, but the real reason I'm back is for the yellow shield." "The thing you used to buy the library?" "Yes." "What do you need it for?" "Research." I respond, simply. She nods and reaches into a filing cabinet. "I had to clear out this drawer completely. It's a lot bigger than I thought it would be." Malory grabs the shield from the drawer. It's obvious it has some weight to it as she struggles at first to lift it. She plops it down on the desk. It makes a thud. "It's also heavier than I thought it would be." She continues. "That's one thing I don't miss about it." I notice the shield is still in the evidence bag. "You didn't take it out of the bag?" I ask . "That's how it came. We wanted to keep everything in tact. " I take the heavy shield. "Are there any microscopes around here?" Malory pauses to think. "Never mind , I'll find one."

The Speaker's Office

The speaker's office is adorned with certificates and awards of varying prestige. There is not a single blank space on the wall. It is cluttered with plaques, and all his shelves are filled with tiny golden statues. There is one particular award that catches my eye. It is a huge plaque labeled Golden Wings Recipient 2015. "That looks like something." I say. "Oh yes. I think that is my favorite one." "What is it for? I ask. "You never heard of the Golden Wings conference?" I shake my head no. "It is an annual event where all the big motivational speakers and self - help guros get together." "Does that mean you're the motivational speaker of the year?" "Something like that." He says, humbly. "Wow. You're a pretty big deal then?" "I guess you could say that." "Have you ever written a book?" I wonder. "I'm on the road so much, I don't have the time for that." "Then how did you win that award?" I question. "The old fashioned way. Word of mouth. There's a reason why the Wellness Center always sends their people here, it's because I'm great at what I do." "So, do you work for the Wellness Center?" I ask. The speaker sits at his desk. "Technically no. I'm more of what you would call a freelancer." "It's probably better that way. They have some strict rules." The speaker chuckles to himself. "What?" I ask. "I know about your unauthorized digging." "They told you about that?" "Yes, but don't worry it's not just you. They fax me notes on all their troublesome employees." "How did they know they know I'd come back here?" "They didn't. They only hoped." He says. I shake my head. "I wouldn't worry too much about them. They like to think they are an exclusive club, but they are not." He states. "What do you mean they're not. I had to go through hell just to become an honorary member?" "For the Wellness Center, yes, but there are countless other organizations that are similar. They just go by different names." "Basically you're telling me that they're a scam." "I didn't say that. They are legit, but I wouldn't let them get under your skin." He informs. "I won't , but it's not like I can go back any time soon." "Sure you can. If they have a problem, they can talk to me." I smile. "Thanks." "No problem. Just do what you have to do. You have a place to rest you head at night , but that doesn't mean you have to stay there all day." I thank him again, and I start to leave. "Wait, aren't you curious about my suggestion for an adventure?" He asks. I turn to the speaker. "I was also given the information that you paid for the library with a shield." He tells me. "Yeah, what about that?" "Where did the shield come from?" "I don't know. It was a strange element that forged itself over Olivia's bubble." "Where did the element come from?" He questions. "It's extraterrestrial.That's all I know." The speaker bites his lip. "You know there is more to that story. I would suggest investigating."

Reservoir

It's a good day for a walk, a great day for a walk. The sun is out ,but it's not beating down on us. Not yet, not at this early hour. Give it some time I'm sure it will. At the moment though, I'm enjoying walking around the reservoir. It's about a mile around. I see turtles, frogs, and ducks. There is much more natural wildlife that roams around here, but this is all that is awake right now. The speaker owns all of this. Somehow it's an impressive spectacle without being obnoxious. I guess it is because he never brags about it. All he does is let the scenery speak for itself,and it says tranquility and openness. At least that's the image he wants to convey. I'm not going to fight him anymore. He never had to let me in. "Why did you give me the tea?" I ask. "It seemed to me you could use a good night's sleep." "But if I recall you said it would be better if I was sleepy because then you'd be able to control me." "Maybe part of controlling you was giving you tea." He responds. "I guess that makes sense." I say that even though I think quite the opposite in my mind. I let it slide. We walk to edge of a dock that overlooks a family of ducks swimming. The speaker laughs to himself. I look up at him, puzzled. "I forgot to bring the bread." "That's ok, I don't mind just watching them." I reply. We do that for a moment. While we're both looking at the ducks, I'm seeing past them. The speaker notices this. "Something on your mind?" He asks. "I'm torn between two sides of my personality." "And they would be?" I take a deep breath. "The first half is the eternal optimist. He sees the possibilities in everything. He's warm and compassionate. He's everybody's friend. I like that guy." "And the other half?" He asks. "The other half wants to devolve into the lowest possible version of myself. He wants to sleep all day and do nothing." "And you want that?" He questions. "No, but I know I'm capable of that." The speaker puts out his hand. "I'm going to stop you right there. The impression I first received of you was "he's another tortured artist." I smirk to myself. "Don't laugh. I'm right." "Yeah, I guess you are." I say. "I am. My instincts are very rarely ever wrong. But-" The speaker points to his temple. "Everyone has chaos. Everyone." "I don't disagree with you. I don't know, maybe my difference is I don't try to pretend it's not there." "That's good, but you can't let it drown you." He says. "I'll try." "Don't try. Do." I smile. "Ok Yoda." He starts to walk away. "How long is your suspension?" "You know about that?" I ask. " I know about everything. Follow me to my office. I have suggestions for your next step. As much as I enjoy your company, I know you're itching for another adventure."

Guest Room

There is no mirror in my room. Not that I need to see my reflection to know that I have blood shot eyes at this early hour. I hear sounds from the outside world. Birds chirping, leaves rustling, and people playing. Nothing that will make me budge. It's a mixture of sloth, and tiredness. The speaker bangs loudly on the bed room door. I throw a pillow over my face. I'd like to avoid that noise from the outside world as well. "Wake up. It's a beautiful day." He announces. "Is it?" "Oh yes, it's quite lovely." I roll on my side. "I'm sure it is, and I'm sure in another couple of hours it will still be nice." "Come on, I already let you sleep in lounger than you should." He says. "Just one more hour." "No now. Open the door." I sigh, but I remain motionless. "Why now?" I ask. "Because you are on my premises and you said you would obey my rules." "Shit, you got me." "I promise if you open the door now we'll just go for a walk around the reservoir. I won't make you bring up any emotional stuff." I spring to the door. "You've got a deal."

Flavorless Tea

I'm left in the dark. Literally, I'm left in the dark. The speaker is in the kitchen making a homeopathic tea for me. I'm told it will help ease my mind and "put me in a better place." Naturally I'm suspicious of any product that makes such claims. Still it's not as unusual as leaving me in the dark to contemplate my worst moments. I'm well aware of what they are.I don't think it's necessary to drag them to the surface. If a wound has heeled, don't open it. That can't be any good. Can it? I don't know, he's the expert, or so I'm told. I see his silhouette enter the room. He walks slowly so as not to spill the steaming cup of tea. "You are in luck, I got a good one." He says while carefully sitting beside me. "What's the flavor?" I ask. "It's chamomile." He reaches out and hands me the cup. I take a sip." I don't taste anything." "It grows on you. Have some more." I'm not thrilled to drink a flavorless tea, but it beats therapy time. I notice he doesn't say a single word while I'm drinking. I decide to take advantage of that and sip the tea as slowly as I humanly can. When I'm completely done I set the tea by my side. "It did grow on you!" He exclaims. "Not really, it still has no flavor." "But you finished it." "I was thirsty." " Shall we begin?" At that exact moment I feel faint. My eyelids are heavy, and I can barely prop my head up. "I would, but I'm feeling woozy." I say. "That means the tea did the trick." "You drugged me?" I question. "I wouldn't put it that way." I groggily stand up. "I don't care right now. I'm going to bed. Don't bother me."

Meditation Attempt

Here I am in the meeting room where I publicly mocked the practices of the speaker not to long ago. There is a part of me that's surprised I came back. Did I want to apologize to this man? Or do I truly feel there is work I need to do here? He told me I need to be vulnerable. Perhaps he is right, but I can't be vulnerable around strange people I've never met. Who can? "You need to calm your mind?" He insists. There's a slew of smart ass remarks I want to make, but I choose to keep to myself. I want to listen to him this time around. Even if I'm attempting to meditate in a room that still smells of petiole oil and incense. I sit criss cross apple sauce in the center of the room, and close my eyes. I try my best to concentrate. After what feels like an eternity I open my eyes. "I can't." I shout. "Sure you can." I turn my head wearily looking at a burning candle. "I don't feel good about that." I say. "Why not?" "I don't think we should leave a burning candle unattended." "It's fine, but if it would make you feel better I could blow it out." "Please do that." I beg. The speaker complies. Not long after we are left in total darkness. "This is not good either." I say. "What now?" "It's dark." "That's the perfect time to meditate but-" Before he can finish his sentence he throws the light switch. I feel my comfort level rise. A slight smile comes over my face. "Is there anything else I can get you before we start?" He asks. "I don't think so." "Good." He sits next to me, and gets in the meditative position. "I have to ask though, have you ever done meditation before?" "Sort of. Every time I try, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle music plays." "What?" "Before I can get to into it the song from the cartoon pops in my head." I explain. "Well, you clearly have some blockage. But I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath." I close my eyes and exhale slowly. "Now imagine all your stress and tension lifting away. Imagine yourself becoming lighter and lighter." For a moment his guided meditation works. I feel at ease. I feel wonderful. Then he describes an ocean breeze, and all I can picture is Michelangelo from Ninja Turtles surf boarding. I try to make the image go away. It won't leave, and the next thing I know I utter "Cowabunga." "What?" The speaker asks, perplexed. I open my eyes. "Heroes in a half shell." The speaker sighs. "Perhaps we should take a break."

Between Weeks

I didn't sleep much last night. I could blame it on being in a new place, but I know that's not the case. I miss her. Oh God, do I miss her. I carry on with my life as best I can , but thoughts of loneliness creep in my mind. It makes my heart heavy and my body lethargic. I know that keeping busy is the best thing for me. The problem is in order to keep busy I need energy. Currently I am in short supply of that due to insomnia. I would have stayed in bed all morning if the aroma of bacon didn't grab my attention. I stumble to a kitchen on the far side of the building. Once there I am greeted by the motivational speaker. He wears red silk pajamas and leans over a skillet. "Glad you're here. Would you like some orange juice?" He asks. "Yes, please." "It's in the fridge." I walk over to the refrigerator and pull out a gallon of orange juice. "Glasses are in the cabinet." He says. I glance at the many cabinets in the kitchen. The speaker opens a cabinet above the stove and takes a glass. "Sorry, I forget it's not automatic for everyone." He says, while handing the glass to me. I take a seat at the kitchen table. "I didn't see this kitchen last time." I tell him. "Not everyone gets to. I only allow my special guests to enter." "I'm special?" I ask in astonishment. "Oh, you're something." He grabs two plates from the cabinet. "I hope you eat well. We have a big day ahead of us." I rub my eyes. " I bet.Would you by any chance have any coffee?" "I do not." "That's a shame." "Why? Are you tired?" He asks. "Yes, very. I didn't sleep much." The speaker smiles. "Good." "How is that good?" I question. "It's good for me because that means you're more likely to follow my instructions."

Refuge

At first I had absolutely no idea where to go.The shock of being kicked out of the place I called home took some time to ware off. I stole one of the falcons and took off aimlessly into the night. I hoped against hope that my next big idea would take place on that flight. It sorta did. I remembered a place I visited not too long ago. I was told that I'd be expected back. That's probably not an invitation, but I'm taking it as such. With any luck they do as well. I land my falcon on the grass outside of the building. It squawks loudly, asking if it should stick around. I say that's not necessary. Like that he takes off into the night. I bang my knuckles on the wooden door to the building as hard as I can. It takes some time, but a very groggy, very agitated motivational speaker answers the door. "Do you have any idea what time it is?" He asks. "3 a.m.?" He sighs. "That's right, 3 a.m. What are you doing here at this hour?" "I don't know if you recall, but last we spoke you were expecting me back." I reply. "Not at 3 a.m." I shrug. "You're the clairvoyant. You should have seen this coming." "I'm not a clairvoyant. I'm sorry, but you can't stay. Not now, you have to go." He says. I look out into the black skies. "My ride kinda took off." "Call him back." He insists. "He'd be kinda upset if I did that." "More upset than the person whose house you're crashing?" I nod. The motivational speaker opens his door, and ushers me in. "You can stay on the couch. We'll start in the morning." I start to walk in, the motivational speaker stops me. "This time you will listen to me. I'm not going to pull teeth again."

Principal's Office

Being sent to the Principal's office was always a nerve wracking experience. My palms would be sweating and my stomach would be turning. Sometimes times it felt like my breakfast would make a reappearance on the floor. I remember sitting outside the famous wooden doors, waiting for them to swing open. I was waiting for the man in charge to greet me, and tell me my sentence. Miraculously it was always a stern "You know better than this" or "what are we going to do with you?" That's all it ever was. I'm not sure why, but it was rarely if ever more than a talking to. I'm sure I'm in the minority , but I wish I could have circumnavigated those meetings. I never enjoyed lectures. Give me my jail time, but don't talk down to me. I'm still not positive if Todd is the man in charge or if there are people above him. All I know is being in his office now brings back all those nasty memories. "What were you thinking?" He condescendingly asks. "I was making a hidden room." "Yeah, you told me that part. I want to know what possessed you to do that?" I shrug. "I thought we needed it." Todd turns red. " You thought we needed it?! What is wrong with you?" "I don't see what the problem is. I own the library." I state. "You own the library, but you don't own the Wellness Center." I squint my eyes. "The floor that you so carelessly dug into is property of the Wellness Center. You can't own that, and you'll never own that." He clarifies. "That's fine. What if I just asked permission to dig." I question. Todd shakes his head. "It's too late for that. You pissed off a lot of people." "What did I do?" I ask. "Beside digging a massive hole, you let in outsiders to our community." He explains. "Are you talking about the construction crew?" "Yes." "No, they're cool." Todd's eyes widen. "Oh, that's great that you think they're cool. You only breached security." "Can't we just erase their memories like in Men in Black?" I ask. Todd rubs his face. "We don't do that." There is a brief silence. " I don't know what to do with you. I really want to kick you out, but unfortunately you signed a contract with us, and I can't break it. Not that easily." "So, I can stay." I say, confused. Todd half smiles. " I may not be able to expel you, but I can suspend you." "What? Where am I supposed to go.?" I ask. "I don't care, but stay away from the Wellness Center for at least a week."

A Crowd Gatters

Nothing will bring people into your library like remodling. I feel flattered that everyone at the Wellness Center threw caution to the wind and decided to see for themselves what was going. When I say everyone, I mean everyone. From Bethany, the accountant, to the guy at the front desk to the Minotaurs. They all wanted to know why there was so much racket coming from the library. Why the hammering and sawing. As soon as they crossed the caution tape, and saw the gaping hole in the ground, they were all stupified. They all stood there, mouths wide open, gazing at the ever increasing hole. I couldn't tell if they were fascinated or horrified. Perhaps a combination of the two. The only on who shared his thoughts with me was Peter. He came up to my side, and placed a hand on my shoulder. "This is a pretty big deal." He says to me. "Yep, we needed it." I reply. "That's arguable." "Trust me, you'll thank me when it's done. " I assure. Peter takes a deep breath. "There's no way to stop this? Is there?" He asks. "No, no turning back now." Peter shakes his head. "That's what I was afraid of." I look up at him. "What's the problem?" Before Peter has the slightest chance to asnswer my question, Todd storms in shouting obsenities. Very unlike him. I have a inkling I screwed up on this one. "What the hell is going on here?" He screams. Peter attempts to defend me. "Well, you see -" "No, I don't care, everybody out." At his angry request ,everyone but Peter and myself shuffle out of the library. They groan as they leave. Todd points to me. "You, in my office. Now!" Todd gets even more upset when he notices I'm not budging. "Why aren't you moving?" He shouts. "I have a feeling I'm in a lot of trouble. So, I don't know why we don't do this here." "Because I want to maintain some professionalism. Now move!"

Plans

Despite my best efforts, I did not find any hidden rooms in the library. If there were any, they would be in the library. It's a cool library, but unfortunately that's all it is. There is nothing hidden beneath the surface. I know it sounds depressing when I put it that way, and it would be a sad statement if it weren't for one small fact. I'm the owner. I have the power to change things. I brought in a contractor and told him about my desire for a secret room. We talked about it in length. We both agreed that a sub basement would be the way to go. Tomorrow he brings in his guys, and the project begins.

Secret Passageways

A childhood friend once told me that every building has a secret passageway. I was skeptical about this statement. He assured me , however, that they're there. It's just no one knows how to find them. We spent the latter half of the afternoon seeking hidden rooms. We knocked on walls, removed random books from shelves, and gazed into mirrors. Of course the only thing discovered was the whimsy of a child. That friend is in the military now. I can't say this with certainty, but I'm guessing his whimsy faded long ago. Mine still hangs on. I like to feed into it from time to time. It turns the ordinary to extraordinary. Currently I am searching my own library for secret passages. Most likely I won't find anything. I'm fine with that. Sometimes it's not about the end product.

Departure

I meet up with Olivia in a quiet place in the clouds. She's leaving in a few short hours. It will only be two weeks. I remind myself that constantly. Yet, I can not seem to let her go. I want to hold on to her forever. Eventually she gently pushes me away. "Are you gonna be ok when I'm gone?" She asks. "I think so." She half smiles. "What do you think you'll do?" I shrug. "Peter suggested I take a break from the library, but that doesn't mean I have to." She puts her arms around my shoulders. "I want you to be happy." She says. "I'll be fine." Olivia nods and piers off into the distance. "Well, the falcon will be here any moment." I grab her hand. "It's not here yet. I'll wait."

Grand Opening

The big day had arrived. We were going to have a ribbon cutting ceremony for the brand spanking new library. I put up shiny red signs throughout the Wellness Center, alerting any passerby of the joyous occasion. No one showed up. That should not have been a surprise . We were dismayed though. It was hard not to be. We put in so much work. The only person who showed up was Peter. He didn't even realize we were having a grand opening. He just wanted to visit. When he came I was half asleep behind the front desk. He tapped his fingers to wake me. "Where are your colleagues?" He asked. "They went to lunch." "You're not hungry?" "I am, but someone's gotta watch the library. Don't you see how see how busy it is?" Peter laughs. "You should be proud. The place looks good." "Thanks." I say, less than enthusiastic. "You're not proud?" "I am, but look around." "It is a ghost town. But it has always been that way." "Then what do I do?" I ask. "You wait." "What?" "If you build it they will come." He says, echoing the famous line from "Field of Dreams." "There has to be a way to bring more people in." I insist. "I hate to break it to you, but people don't read as much as you think they do. Even up here." "What you saying is that I can't ever expect many patrons?" I question. Peter shakes his head. "You'll get what you need. Stop working so hard." "Easier said than done." I utter. Peter looks me in the eye. "You're doing well. Let the place run on auto pilot. Malory is good, she can take it from here."

All Done?

With a slightly renewed sense of purpose I went back to the drawing board. We worked mostly in silence as we were determined to finish before another day was done. When I placed the last book on the shelf I stared up in wonderment on our job well done. We had just about every sub genre imaginable. It was a proud moment. Until I turned around to see a massive pile of books still on the floor. "How is that possible?" I shout. Malory scratches her head. "This didn't happen last time." "Did we do something wrong?" Olivia asks. "I don't think so." Malory says. "What should we do?" Olivia wonders. "I'm not re doing it." I blurt. "No, I can't say I blame you." Malory replies. "We need to do something with those books." Olivia says. I think for a moment. "What if we left them in a box?" They both look at me as if I'm crazy. "No one knows we have new books, what if we just switch out the books on the shelves every so often?" "I've never head of that before, but I kinda like it." Malory responds. I smile. "Good. Now we have to tell the public about our new library."

Lobby Zombie

I have no idea what I'm watching. I think it is some sort of sport, but there have been so many commercials that I honestly forgot. Not that I was paying close attention in the first place. Pretty much as soon as I got to the lobby I plopped down on the nearest couch that faced the T.V. I have coffee. I haven't taken one sip of it. I just hold it in my right hand and let it grow cold. Olivia sits next to me. She's been there for a while. At least ten minuets. I haven't even said a word to her. I've been absorbed in my current state of nothingness. "Sorry I left." I say, still staring at the T.V. "That's ok. I know sometimes you gotta do your own thing." I nod. "Is there a lot left?" I ask. "Not much. You should check it out. It looks pretty good." I turn to her finally. "Yeah?" "Yeah, I created a historical fiction section." I half smile. "I like the sound of that." "So, you ready to check it out?" She asks. There is a beat. "What the matter?" "You think we can do this?" I question. "Hard part's almost over." She replies. "No it's not. The hard part is getting people to come to the library." "Who cares if they don't. We still have a kick ass library regardless." She responds. "I guess you're right." Olivia chuckles. "Of course I'm right. Now, let's go."

Book Piles

We spent the latter half of the day removing every single newly shelved book. My hands are cramping, and my muscles are sore. On the ground are piles and piles of books. A collective of everything that civilizations thought was important enough to document at one point. I honestly don't know where to start. Malory had never even heard of the Dewey Decimal system before. I know it's 2015, and computers solve much of the complex filing. But how can you become a librarian and at least have some idea of it. I feel like I'm over my head . Can I do this? Maybe I just need to take a walk away from here. Go to the gym or something.

The New Edition

A disorganized desk, locker, or room is equal to a disorganized mind. Phrases former teachers would utter to me. At the time , I thought it was merely something annoying they would say to get under my skin. Now I'm ready to eat crow. There may be some truth to those words. I look upon our newly shelved books. To be fair they are all put away. I will give Malory credit for that. It's just harder than it was before to find anything. There is no rhyme or reason to how the books are shelved. "Joy of Cooking " is next to "100 Years of Solitude." My head is spinning from the clutter. I can sense Olivia is bothered as well. Malory can not read faces. She still holds the same enthusiasm. "What do you think?" She asks. "It's something." Olivia replies. "I couldn't figure out where to put the new books, so I made one big section for them." "And you put them all together." Olivia adds. Malory smiles. "Isn't it great?" "I feel it's lacking a few sections." I say. "Oh, like what?" She asks, worriedly. "Well, Young Adult for one." Malory is taken aback. "Excuse me?" "Young Adult." I repeat. "We do not permit pornographic material in the library." She says, firmly. "Its another name for teenage literature." Olivia calmly assures. Malory grabs "War and Peace" from the shelf. "You mean something like this?" "Not quite. Something more like Harry Potter." Olivia says. Malory cranes her neck at the huge shelf. "We might have that." Olivia glances at the books in disarray. "I hate to say it, but we will be redoing this."

About the Trip

"How was it? What did you think?" Malory asks eagerly. "I enjoyed the retreat. I can't speak for everyone though." Olivia says while eyeing me. "It's just not what I thought it would be." I reply, defensively. "What were you expecting?" Malory questions. "I thought I'd learn more about maintaining a library." Malory 's jaw practically drops. "Those were some of our core beliefs. You were supposed to integrate what you learned from the retreat with what you already know." I snap my fingers. "Missed opportunity." "That it was." Malory says. "I'm better off . I never needed that retreat. Work is my therapy." I quip. Malory raises her eyebrow. "That's troubling." "No it's not. I'd rather work than stay stagnant. Nothing is worse than being stagnant." "I suppose that's true." She utters. "It is. Everyone needs a sense of purpose. I think I found mine here." "No kidding?" Olivia replies. I nod. "I'm happy to hear that. I hope it won't upset you, but while you were gone we shelved all the books." Malory informs. "Where did you put them?" Olivia asks. "We had a few extra shelves . Nothing is labeled yet. We'd really like your opinions." Olivia looks at me. "Let's go. We have work to do."

Eliminate the Negative

Words like couldn't, shouldn't, wouldn't, can't, and won't are eliminated from our vocabulary . Anyone caught using said words must stand in front of the group and use more positive words. The humiliating procedure is supposed to make one think twice about the kind of words they use. I just see it as needlessly picking on someone. Sometimes a negative is necessary. Sometimes it's the only thing to describe a situation. As you may have guessed , I was called out more than once. I didn't learn to speak in a positive light. All it taught me was to keep my mouth shut. That's what I did for the remainder of my stay. In the beginning I could tell the speaker was frustrated at my lack of cooperation. Eventually he gave up trying to open me up. He let me be me. When we left, everybody was a glow. They all gave each other hugs. I couldn't get out of their fast enough. I remember being on the falcon and the speaker walking up to me. He gave a lecture about vulnerability and how important it is. He hoped that I would come back at a later time. I most likely won't, but you never know.

Circle of Feelings

I shouldn't be surprised to learn that this retreat is more of a therapy thing. No one will admit that, but no one has to. It's fairly obvious. When the speaker has everyone sit in a circle and talk about feelings there is little else it could be. Yet, it seems as though everyone is eating this up. Why? Don't they know that this man is just trying to pick their brains? I see it clear as day. Even if no one else does. He likes to play a game while we're in the circle. He'll toss the ball to a random person. Once we catch the ball we have to answer a personal question, and then throw it to someone else. Every time I get the ball I answer as short as I can and toss it right away. I act like it's hot potato. I never hold it longer than a few seconds. Sometimes I speak so fast only mumbles come out. I know it's rude, but I don't know him. He doesn't know me. As far as I'm concerned, I don't have to answer anything. Unfortunately, my strategy only peeks his interest in me. This will be an interesting retreat indeed.

20 Questions

Making an escape is not easy. At least not when the motivational speaker is standing right next to you. Another example where the idea of politeness strikes again. He asks us many personal questions. Where did we grow up? What kind of food do we like? What are we afraid of? I don't respond to any of his questions. Even if I knew him personally, I think this would still be a bit invasive. I look out in to the pond. It's as if I keep staring into the murky waters an answer will come to me. Despite my silence, he doesn't take the hint that I don't want to talk. That only annoys me further. I strongly dislike people who can't take a hint. After five minuets of me being quiet, and Olivia barely speaking, he glances at his watch. "Looks like its time to head back in." "You go ahead, we'll be right with you." I say. He sees rights through our facade. "I think we should go in together." He insists. "We have some catching up to do. We'll meet you inside." I reply. "Where are you going?" He asks, jumping to it. "What?" I nervously laugh. " I've seen this s before. Where are you going?" He asks again. I shake my head. "Away from here." "You have to understand, this retreat isn't what we thought it would be." Olivia says. "What did you think it would be?" I shrug. "Something relevant to owning a library." The speaker is trying his best not to be angry. " I am teaching you how to be a leader. Don't you think that would be helpful?" "Not really." I respond, simply. The speaker takes a deep breath. "You are free to leave, but I don't think you should." "Why not?" I ask. "Because it is the most cowardly thing you could do right now. Do you want to be a coward?" I hang my head and walk into the building. I know I'm playing into his game, but he got me. Plan and simple, he got me.

The Motivational Speaker

"You are being led to a greater and better you! Isn't that great? Isn't that exciting.?" A middle aged man with a head microphone eagerly shouts to the most diverse room full of people. So many different backgrounds. They all hang to his every word. They all cheer and applaud him.Well, not everybody. We took a falcon to an undisclosed area in the middle of nowhere in hopes that we would learn more about their methods.We haven't learned anything new. We've just been listening to the banter of a motivational speaker. He talks extensively about unlocking your full potential and being the best you. Mind you, I don't disagree with what he says , but I didn't need to go on a retreat to hear his "secrets to life." I could have just as easily cracked open a book. I slump in my chair. Olivia glances over at me. "You're not having any fun?" She asks. I don't respond. If I admit my disgruntled state of mind it may hurt her, yet I can't seem to lie either. Instead, my silence says everything. "Oh." She says, disappointed. I straighten up in my seat. "I don't think we need this." I reply. "I don't know, he makes some good points." I shrug. "I guess. How long do you think this will be?" I ask. "Malory said it usually lasts a couple of days." I sigh and sink again. All the sudden the motivational speaker stops talking. Everyone gets out of their chairs. "Looks like a break." Olivia tells me. "Thank God." I utter. Olivia leans over to me. "I don't think this is a good idea, but maybe we can escape now." I excitedly nod. Seeing as how there are so many people standing , and walking in the aisles, an escape should be easy. We don't bother to scan the room. As soon as I have my back turned I hear "You there." I don't have to turn to know who it is. Sure enough, I'm right. It's the motivational speaker. "Where are you going?" He asks. "We needed some air." Olivia responds. The motivational speaker looks me directly in the eye. "I couldn't help but notice during my speech you appeared less than happy." "I'm just tired." I reply. "Well, how about I join you outside? I could use some fresh air myself." He says. I reluctantly agree. Escape may be more tricky than I had anticipated.

Killing Time

When I was younger, one of my favorite things to do to kill time was to skim through an encyclopedia. I would pick up a random letter from the shelf, (It was usually one of the middle ones) and I'd flip through it. I didn't know what I was looking for. Most of the time, I was merely admiring the glossy images. It may sound odd, but it was fun. It was unintentional learning.
In this day and age, one could look up various facts and images with minimal effort. It's not the same at all though. There is a part of me that believes accumulating knowledge that was is cheating. That if you can get information via the click of a button, then you didn't earn it. I know it's an old and outdated way of thinking. I can't exactly help it though. I respect technology. I enjoy how it has made my life easier, but anyone who has used an encyclopedia before the internet would agree with me. There's just something about having the material in your hands. With that said, we are using the microfiche. It is noisy, and by all means it's counterproductive. I don't care so much about the latter. We don't need to be productive today. Today is a trip down memory lane. We look up random articles from our birth years. (1985 and 1990) We don't find too much other than "Silence of the Lambs" won Best Picture in 1990, and the Chicago Bears won the Super Bowl in 1985. Basically facts we already knew. I could dig deeper, but I don't want to. Not right now at least. Facts and information will come when they are supposed to. At this moment I just want to enjoy a piece of history.

Changes

"Microfiche?" Malory, the librarian asks with the most puzzled expression. "It was the internet before the internet." I say. "They're machines that are used to look up articles as well as some films." Olivia clarifies. "Oh, we have a couple of those in the back." Malory replies. I start to leave. Olivia yanks my cape and pulls me back like a yo yo. "We have other things we wish to request." Olivia tells her. Malory's mouth shrinks. "The books were a good start, but we need subcategories." Olivia explains. "Subcategories?" Malory repeats. "Yes, for example "The Swiss Family Robinson?" Where do you think that belongs?" Olivia asks. Malory shakes nervously. Olivia exhales. "Well, it has adventure, but it also has the element of family." "So, a family adventure?" Malory asks. Olivia smiles. "Yes." "A Family Adventure? Would that be under Mind, Body, or Spirit?" Before either of us can respond Malory rubs her head. "I can't think." "I'm sure it's not easy having someone come in and change all the rules. " I say as comforting as I can. Malory stops rubbing her head. "No, it's not." "I mean you probably went to school for this." I further explain. She nods. " I did." "And now we're changing everything." Olivia pulls me to the side. "What are you doing?" She asks. "Relax, I got this." I continue my conversation with Malory. "Was it a top school?" I wonder, out loud. " Like the rest of the Wellness Center, you needed to be part of a bloodline. So, you could say it was pretty prestigious." "I don't want to look like the bad guy, what if before we changed anything else we took a gander at a packet or something that contains your core beliefs?" I ask. "There isn't a packet, but I could sign you up for a retreat. It's helpful for anyone interested in becoming a librarian." She says. "Perfect! When is it?" I exclaim. She types on her computer. "There's one coming up this Tuesday." "Sign us up." I shout. "Wait! How long is this?" Olivia asks. "It should only be a few days. Sometimes it lasts longer." "Sign us up." I shout again, louder this time. Malory signs us up. A big smile comes across her face. "I just signed you up. I'm so glad you"re doing this. It will be most helpful." I thank Malory, and start to walk away. "What did you just do?" Olivia asks me. "Signed us up for a retreat." "I know, but you know I'm going to be on vacation soon." "You heard her, it should only take a couple of days." I assure her. "But what if it is longer?" "You could always leave early. Don't worry I'll take copious notes. I won't leave you in the dark." Olivia shakes her head. "Ok, what do we do now?" "Let's waste time with the microfiche."

Back to Work

"You know, we have tables and desks." Olivia says to me while placing a large box of books by my feet. I'm still sprawled out on the floor. "I know. I prefer reading like this." I reply. "Whatever makes you happy. Could you give me a hand though?" I clasp "There's Treasure Everywhere " shut. She has perfect timing. I literally finished the last panel when she walked by. "So, were you getting ideas?" She asks, referring to my Calvin and Hobbes books. "More so just relaxing. It's a nice little escape." "I get that, but next time when you go for a midnight walk could you leave a note?" I look down. She got me. "Yeah, sorry." I say. "It's fine. Um , I didn't do much work. Mostly just talked to Malory." I squint. "Malory? The librarian?" She clarifies. "That's her name?" I ask, surprised . "You've been here all morning, how do you not know her name?" Olivia questions . I shrug. " I don't know. I just took my books and walked off." Olivia chuckles. "We should tweak your people skills." "Yeah, I suppose." I glance at the box of books. "Where's that going?" "That's the problem. In order to shelf those books, I need to rearrange everything." Olivia replies. "And they won't fit in Mind, Body, or Spirit?" I ask. "They could, but we need subcategories. We want people to be able to find what they are looking for easily." "I'm sensing work." I groan. Olivia smiles. "You knew it was inevitable." I nod in agreement. "It won't be bad. We're in charge." Olivia continues. "Does that mean I can suggest bringing back microfiche?" Olivia nods. "Sure, if that's what you want."

It's Here!

"Revenge of The Babysat" , "Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Snow Goons" , and my personal favorite "There's Treasure Everywhere." The librarian really came through on this. For someone who had never heard of the popular comic strip before, she surprised me by ordering three books. It would be nice to have the complete collection, but three is a good start. I sprawl out in the middle of an aisle with the books surrounding me. I relive bumpy wagon rides, trips to space, and I remember a friendship with a tiger. I rediscovered a gem from my childhood. Hours pass. My eyes remain glued to these books. Nothing else matters right now.

Early Start

I am shaken awake. I look up to see the librarian hovering above me. All the lights in the hallway are still off. "What time is it?" I ask, groggily. "8 a.m." "What time does the library open?" "9 a.m." "Do you always come in an hour early?" The librarian shakes her head. "No, there was a delivery last night. Your books came in." I stretch out my arms. "All of them?" I ask. "Yes, all of them. Even the comic strip one." The librarian takes the key out of her pocket. She starts to unlock the door, but stops when she notices me staring. "What?" She wonders. "You have a key?" "Yes." "And the delivery guy also has a key?" She turns to me. "Why don't you have a key?" I shrug. "You should get that cleared up." She insists. "I agree, but first I'd like to read a little bit of Calvin and Hobbes. Do you mind if we wait to put the books away?" The librarian thinks for a moment. I can sense my question puts her ill at ease. She is the kind of person who needs to do something right away. "I guess not, although I am here an hour early." She says. "You can always spend that time reading." I suggest. The librarian is perplexed. "There are some good titles in there." I continue. The librarian nods. "Ok, I could do that. Should we get your partner?" She asks. "Olivia? No, I don't want to wake her. Besides, she always finds me." With that the librarian unlocked the door to the library.