Leaf Pit

Because the base of the willow tree was on an angle, it wasn't difficult to scale. Exhausting, a little, but difficult? Hardly. When we got to the opening  I wanted to jump right in. Olivia, however, pulled me back."Wait. We don't know how deep it is." She warned. Olivia shot a pink heart out of her palm. It traveled for a long distance in the dark before finally  landing on a pile of leaves.The heart illuminated the hollow and gave the leaves a pink glow. "It's beautiful." Olivia says in admiration. "Yeah, and even better, it's safe." Without waiting for a response from Olivia, I jump into the pit. Pink, enormous, crunchy leaves rush before my eyes. I'm falling and falling, but I'm not scared. It's like when you are a child, but better. I stop before hitting the bottom. That's when I hear Whoosh. I swim up the many layers of pink leaves. It takes some time, but I eventually find a smiling Olivia under a leaf. "That was fun." She says.  "It was. You ready to go in now?" She reluctantly nods and we swim away. We unexpectedly bump into a wall. "What is this?" Olivia asks. I grope the wall. "I don't know,  but it feels like a door." "Why would there be a door here? There wasn't one before." "Couldn't tell you." I knock on the door with my little fists. "No one's going to hear us." She says. "Well, we gotta do something." "I know. We might have to get out of here. "

Caterpillar Ride

It took the greater part of the day to get to Hilda's Inn, and that was with the caterpillar taking short cuts going up and down trees. I can only imagine how long it would have taken if Olivia and I decided to walk the whole way. We slid off the caterpillar. We thanked him thoroughly and paid him handsomly. It was then that I realized that the opening in the willow tree was some distance up. I had forgotten that there was at least a foot between the base of the tree and the opening. It's nothing when you are normal size, but quite a Journey otherwise. "Hey, can you do one more thing for us?" I ask the caterpillar. "Afraid I can't." The caterpillar starts to scoot away. "Come on, we just need to get in there." "Sorry, I'm already miles away." "Please." I beg. "Forget him." Olivia says. I sigh. I look up at the tree.  "I guess we can climb this thing."

The Bus

"Hey! Are you coming, or are you staying?" An angry, impatient voice shouts. I open my eyes to see a furry, green caterpillar   looking down at me. "Huh?" "I said are you coming or are you staying?" "I don't understand." "Look, pal, I don't have time for this. I got plenty of other stops." "Wait, are you the bus?" I  ask. "No, I'm your fairy Godmother. Of course I'm the bus. What do you think this is?" "Ok. Yeah I'm coming. Just let wake her up." I say groggily. "Well hurry up." I jostle Olivia up, and explain the bus situation. She doesn't question it, and why should she? It's not the most absurd thing we've seen. We climb on to the back of the caterpillar. "Where to?" He asks. "Hilda's Inn." I  say. "Where?" "The willow tree." Olivia clarifies. "Gotcha. It's a bit of a distance though." "I don't mind." I say. "It'll cost you a bit." "I don't mind." "Then we're off."

No Taxis

Olivia and I decided that we had our fill of insect world and would head back to Hilda's Inn to our original sizes. The only problem is that when you are tiny everything is a long distance away. Footprints became craters. Puddles became lakes. After walking what would be a foot in our normal size, we became dog tired. We nearly collapsed. "I know what you said earlier about the taxi, but-" "Forget what I said. We're getting a taxi." I say. We both stick our thumbs out. Unlike last time, no taxi shows up automatically. "That's weird." Olivia says. "Don't worry. someone will see us." I assure. We continue to walk with our thumbs out. We grow even more tired, and we want to give up, but we can't. "Maybe they are all on break." Olivia suggests. We both go with the suggestion and continue onward. Now our legs are like noodles. We can barely stand. Our vision is blurry. I think I see something, but I'm not sure. "You see that?" I ask. "Yeah. It says bus stop." It takes a minute , but we both shout with excitement. We use what energy we have left to amble over to the stop, and then we collapse.

the Next Day

Sleeping on a pull out couch is not the most comfortable thing in the world, but  Olivia and I were tired and wore out. We ended up sleeping till mid afternoon. By the time we woke there was no sign of the Ladybugs. The only thing they left behind was a note written in neat, cursive handwriting on the the T.V.  It said " Sorry. Din't have the heart to wake you. We asked up front, they said you can leave when you are ready. Just lock the door behind you. Hope to see you soon. If not that's ok. It was nice meeting you - Myrtle."   The niceness of these two, strange creatures warmed my heart. I just wished I appreciated them more at the time. Olivia glanced at the note. "Should we try to catch up to them?" I shake my head. "They're probably long gone." "I bet the band is too." She says. "That is if they ever showed up to breakfast." Olivia nods. "Wanna get out of here?" "Yeah, but no taxi's. I don't think my stomach could handle it so early." "I don't think it's that early anymore." She points out. "True. Even still I don't think I could  handle it at the moment." "That's fine. What should we do though?" "We'll start walking, and then we'll figure it out."

Questioning the Centipede

We weren't 100% sure where the Box Elders ran off to. It was likely that the went back to the motel. However, I wouldn't put it past them to move on to the next town already. The only way to know for sure would be to ask the front desk. Just like when we checked in the first time, we saw a sleeping centipede behind the desk. Myrtle coughed politely in hopes hopes of waking him. It didn't work, and I didn't feel like waiting around, so I pounded on the desk as hard as I could. He woke up, startled. "Huh? What?" "Hi, we were just wondering if The Box Elders are staying here tonight?" Myrtle asks. The centipede squints his eyes. "Who?" "The Box Elders? They're a band." I say. He scratches his head. "I think I've heard of them." "You should. They were here last night." I say. His eyes open. "Oh yeah. I've heard of them, but I couldn't tell you if they were here." "That means they're here." Myrtle squeeled. "No it means I can't tell if they were here." "They're here. They're here." Myrtle says , jumping up and down. "No. That's not what I said." "Can you just cut the shit and give us their room numbers?" I ask. "I can't do that. I can't give out room numbers." "Why not?" Olivia asks. "Because that's confidential information and I don't want to get fired." "But we know the band." I say. "Sure you do,and I'm the mayor." He quips. Olivia and I stare at him. "I'm not, but I'm still not giving out the room numbers, so you can give up." "It's fine. We can try to find them in the morning. " Mitch says. I sigh. "Sure." I glance at the clock on the wall. It's now almost five. "I guess we better get a room for the night." The centipede flips through his book. "Sorry. Looks like all our rooms are filled." "What?" "Shoulda come here earlier." I  am now beat red. Mitch places his hand on my shoulder. In a comforting voice he says "Why don't you stay with us tonight? We have a pull out couch." I look to Olivia. She half smiles and shrugs. I look back to Mitch. "Sure."

Stood Up

The signing stretched into the wee hours of the night. I was surprised the ladybugs were willing to wait it out so long. Several times I reminded them that they didn't have to stay. They always responded with "Are you kidding me?" Or "We wouldn't miss this for the world. "Finally, around 1 a.m., the last person in line had their merchandise signed. All of the lights were turned on and the janitorial staff came out. The band stood up. Naturally, I expected them to come to the bar. However, they walked the opposite direction, away from the bar. "Where are you going?" I shouted. "Don't worry. We haven't forgotten about you guys. We just gotta do some stuff. " The singer says. The band exits the lounge. We wait and we wait. A full two hours pass. It is at this point that Olivia and I realize that the band isn't coming back. The ladybugs on the other hand remain optimistic. So we wait another hour. A testy fly bartender informs us that it's closing time, and that we don't have to go have go home, but we can't stay here. We comply with the bartender. Olivia and I apologize to the ladybugs hangdoggedly.  They still have spry energy. They say it's ok and that they are probably at the motel now. I go along with the ladybugs' plan of springing up on them at the motel just so I can give the band a piece of my mind.

Waiting By the Bar

We weren't at the end of the line. There were actually many people behind us. That being said the whole signing process took a while, but we didn't mind. We were content waiting by the bar. We sat on stools. We could see the whole lounge from our vantage point. I saw Mitch and Myrtle as they were about to leave. I waved to them. I knew instantly that that was a bad idea because I'd probably be stuck with them for the rest of the night now. Sure enough , they walked over to us. Without saying a "hi" or a "hello" they showed us their sweaters they had signed. They were thick, wool sweaters. It seemed an odd thing to bring to a signing, but an even odder thing for a band to put their faces on. They went on and on about how polite and nice they were. Myrtle gushed about how handsom the singer was. Mitch pretended not to hear that. They eventually ran out of steam and took a breath. "So, what did you get signed?" Myrtle asks. "Nothing." Olivia says. "You didn't have them sign anything?" Myrtle gasps. "We didn't have anything." "Mytle, they know the band. They don't need anything signed." "That's right. What did you talk about? I bet it was interesting." Olivia shrugs. "We didn't really have much chance to talk." "Wait a minute. That's why you two are sitting at the bar, isn't it?" Mitch asks. I  want to make up an elaborate lie, or at least say "no" , but all I can utter is "Um." "It is. Myrtle did you hear that? The band will be here." Before I have the chance to object, Mitch orders two Shirley Temples and sits down beside us.

Meet N' Greet

It was neat to see the Box Elders' many fans patiently waiting for the band to sign their merchandise. Some brought records or cassettes. Some brought hats or T - shirts. No one in line was without a Box Elder product of some sort. It made me wonder, did they all bring these items on the off chance that the band would do a signing afterwards?Maybe there was a merchandise seller somewhere. I suppose that would make sense. I didn't see anything, but I was pretty engrossed in the show. Olivia and I waited in line for our chance to "meet" the band. When we finally got to walk up to the table, the singer gave us a huge smile. " There you are. We were worried about you." "Oh sorry. We were given a tour of the town." I say. "It's alright. Fascinating town. I hope you two had a nice time." Before we had a chance to respond, the rhythm guitarist interrupts us. "Do you have something for us to sign?" "Hey! Don't be a dickhead." The singer shouts. "Well, do you?" The rhythm guitarist asks. Olivia and I shake our heads. "Then I'm afraid you're gonna have to go. You're holding up the line." Not wanting to cause anymore trouble, Olivia and I start to walk away. The singer calls after us. "We'll meet you by the bar. It shouldn't be much longer."

Encore!

The Box Elders played well into the night. I believe they did a total of four encores. By the end, their hoarse "Thank yous" were drowned out by a roaring ovation. It was obvious that the audience wanted yet one more encore. The band, however did not have it in them. They left the stage and the house lights went up. I could hear the crowed talking amongst themselves, saying this was the best performance. The band eventually came back onstage and announced that they would be sighing autographs at this time. They were soon flooded by adoring fans. Everybody and their mother wanted an autograph. At first I feared for their safety. Thinking that they'd be mobbed, but I soon discovered a bigger bug near the stage keeping order. A manager perhaps? At any rate, it was nice to see them doing well. Olivia and I even got in line. Granted we were near the way back, but we could wait.

They Shine

River Bank is where the Box Elders shined. The crowd absolutely loved them. The band fed off their good energy and kept the tempo up as much as possible. They played "Incense Peppermint" by Strawberry Alarm clock," Summer in the City" by the Loving Spoonfuls,  "California Dreaming" by Mama's and Papa's,  and many more classics. Everything was devoured and loved. Screams of  ecstasy broke when they played. It was a wonder to me why the band would choose to travel anywhere else when this was clearly where their fan base was. The crowd even enjoyed a magic act performed by the drummer between sets. It wasn't particularly good. The giant rings that he was supposed to magically unstick were seemingly glued together, and his rabbit did not want to come out of his hat. But he had charisma, and that's what the audience ate up. The rest of the band came back ten minuets later, refreshed and dare I say, happy? Who knows getting a drink with them afterwards might actually be more pleasant this time around.

Slot Machine

Seven, bell, cherry. Cherry, seven, diamond. Diamond, diamond, cherry.  Damn it! But I'm getting closer. I know I am. I pull the lever to the slot machine. I know there is a button I could press instead. That would be quicker, and in theory I would receive my winnings faster. However, I find the lever more fun. I pull with all my might. This one is the one. I can feel it. The symbols on the slot machine spin 'round and 'round. I tap my fingers impatiently. First symbol, bell. Second symbol, bell. I hold my breath. The third symbol spun and spun until finally landing on seven. Fuck. I looked down at my cup. My coins were vastly diminishing, and I hadn't won yet. I could move to another slot machine, but with my luck that's when an old lady would swoop in and win big. I couldn't let that happen. I took out a new coin. Just as I'm getting ready to throw the coin in I hear a guitar riff. It is haunting and familiar. The riff is followed by a very deep voice singing the opening line to Neil Diamond's "Girl, You'll Be a Woman." I glanced over my shoulder to see the Box Elders on stage.

Mini Golf

I'm terrible at mini golf. Even with the many fun bank shots and tricks you can do around the castles and windmills. Halfway through the game, the ladybugs feel sorry for me. Myrtle attempts to show me the proper putting stance. Mitch tells me to clear my mind and has me do breathing exercises. Despite their help I someone did worse. Perhaps I psyched myself out. We finished the game. Myrtle came in first with Mitch in a close second. Olivia was in third, and I was dead last in fourth place. I didn't mind, however. The way I saw it someone had to get last place. It might as well be me. We all got vanilla and chocolate swirl comes afterwards. The four of us sat on a nearby park bench, eating our cones and watching the sun set. The sky was a beautiful mixture of purple and pink. It was a nice end to an odd day. Mitch glanced at his wrist watch. "Clubs should be opening soon." Myrtle squeeled with delight. "That means gambling!" Correction, it was a nice middle to an odd day.

Ice Harvest History

Back in the day River Bank was an ice harvesting town. For those of you that are unfamiliar with this term I'll explain. Ice harvesting was a practice that was popular until the mid twentyith century .Around the time when the freezer became accessible on the home level. A river or sometimes a deep pit filled with frozen water is where one would harvest the ice. A series of plows and picks would be used to remove large, heavy pieces of ice. Those slabs of ice were then shipped to ice houses in various areas of the country. It's fascinating history, really. It's just a shame that River Bank is no more than a cheesy Branson Esq city now. But in a few minutes I'll be playing mini golf with two eccentric ladybugs whom I just met. So, there's that.

The Ladybugs

My prayers were not answered. I suppose asking for a quiet breakfast was a bit too much. I should explain, I don't mind meeting and befriending new and exciting people. I just would like to do it on my own time. Preferably when I'm more awake. The husband and wife ladybug walked over to us. Before I had a chance to say "No we'd like to eat alone" and sound like a dick, they pulled out two seats and sat down by us. "I'm Mitch. This is my wife, Myrtle." The husband lady bug says. Olivia introduces us to the ladybugs. There is a brief silence. "This your first time in River Bank?" Mitch asks. "Sure is. " Olivia says. And then, "What is there to see?" Mitch stared at us, shocked. "What is there to see?" He gasps. "Yeah, what is there to see?" Olivia asks. "For starters there are shows and gambling." "Shows? Like lounge singers?" I ask. "There is that, but I personally think the main attraction is this 60's cover  band. They go by the name The Box Elders." Myrtle says. "We saw them last night." I reply. Myrtle's mouth is wide open. "Get out." "Yeah, we actually came in with them." Mitch smiles. "How did you get so lucky?" I shrug. "I don't know. Right place. Right time." "I'll say. What are they like?" Myrtle asks. Olivia and I stare at each other for a moment. The first two words that come to mind are drunk and depressed. However, Olivia, like a politician found the right answer. "They are quite the characters." The Ladybugs are a glow. It is as if by knowing us they know the Box Elders. "I wonder where they are though. They're gonna miss breakfast." I say. "Oh, honey. Did you really expect them to come down here for breakfast?" Myrtle asks. "I guess I did. " She shakes her head. "Oh no, I'm sure they had breakfast delivered to their rooms. I wouldn't even  be surprised if you don't see them till tonight." "Me either, but don't worry. You two seem nice. We'll show you around River Bank. Make sure you have a fun time today." Mitch adds. I try to hide my discomfort. All I can seem to say is "Sounds great."

Continental Breakfast

The initial idea was to avoid the continental breakfast all together. However, after a night of virtually no sleep on a bed that was harder than concrete, it was hard to turn down at least a cup of coffee. We hiked up the steep hill to the main building in a zombie - like state. There were four red eyes among us, and multiple bags and circles. The breakfast was located in a turret of Victorian house. Oddly, more care went into this one room all the rest of motel. There was a long table with a while table cloth. It had an a whole assortment of breakfast items. At the front ( towards the entrance) was fruit. Cantaloupe, pineapples, blueberries, strawberries, kiwi, mangoes, cherries,  and they were all fresh. Olivia and I craned our necks to find the coffee pot. It was all the way at the opposite end. "That's strange, you'd think the coffee would be at the front." Olivia says.  She starts to walk away. I pick up a plate. "I'll be right with you. Just gonna get some fruit." Olivia shrugs. "I suppose the fruit is ok." I fill my plate with every single fruit available. Then I take a seat by the window with Olivia. We are the only ones in the room, and we enjoy the peace and quiet of the morning. Until two large ladybugs come bumbling in. They look like out of towners as well. The husband wears a fishing hat, and the wife wears big, round sunglasses, even though they are indoors. I watch them grabbing items off the buffet line, and then almost instinctively the husband turns to see me looking at him. At that moment I cross my fingers and silently pray that they don't sit by us.

Room 56

It is hard to find a motel room in the dark. Even harder to find it when most the room numbers are falling off. Olivia and I practically had to walk up to each door, but we eventually found it. Room 56. The six was flipped over. To the untrained eye it could easily look like Room 59. Our key, however, fit in the door. So, that right there dispelled any doubts. The first thing I noticed was the lack of windows on any of the oatmeal walls. "Guess he wasn't kidding when he said there was no view." I say. "I don't know about that." Olivia says, walking over to a small tube T.V. "This is our window to the world." She turns on the T.V.  It's static. She flips the channels. Nothing but static. "Maybe not." "At least there is a bed." I point out. "Thank God." Olivia leaps onto the bed. She spreads out in a starfish position. "How is it?" I ask. "Terrible. This has got to be the world's hardest mattress." "At least it's something." "I suppose." I sit down by the desk in the corner. I unlace my shoes. All the sudden I start chuckling to myself. "What's so funny?" Olivia asks. "Well, normally I'd be worried about bed bugs in a place like this, but it's very possible they're next door to us." Olivia groans. "Don't remind me." I decide to change the subject. "Would you like to leave River Bank tomorrow?" "No, we can stay. I just don't think I can trust breakfast here." "Fair enough." And with that, I turn out the light.

Sleepy Desk Clerk

The main building felt as if we was a mile away. We trudged up a steep hill to find a delapadated Victorian house. The front lights were on, but it didn't exactly look official. However, the front door was wide open. So, we took that as an inducation to come in. Inside there was a giant centipede sleeping behind the desk. Olivia rang the belle repeatedly to get his attention. He jerked his head off the desk, frightened. "What? Who are you? What do you want?" "Relax. We don't mean any harm. We just want a room." I say. "A room?" "Yeah, a room." The centipede yawns. "You really should have come earlier." "We know, but do you have a room?" Olivia asks. "That depends. What are you looking for?" Olivia squints her eyes. "A place with a bed. Maybe a bathroom too." "I mean are you looking for something with a view?" "We're not looking for anything in particular. We just want something where we can rest for a few hours." I clarify. The centipede  takes a deep breath. He turns to the wall off keys. He takes a key off the wall and tosses it on the desk. "Room 56. It's pretty basic. No view or anything, but it's got your bed and your bathroom." I pick up the key. "That's perfect." Olivia and I start to walk away. "I forgot to tell you. Check out is at 11, but the continental breakfast is at 10." "You have a continental breakfast?" I ask. Olivia shoots me a "no fucking way" look. "Oh yeah, I make everything myself." Olivia half smiles. "We'll see. We might not be up." We take off in the dark to find out motel room.

Motel Parking Lot

I expected to see gambling boats, boardwalk restaurants, and street performers when we arrived at River Bank. Instead I got to see a rundown motel. Lights were missing from the sign, room numbers were upsidedown, and the parking lot was littered with cigarette butts and broken bottles. Nevertheless the band seemed excited when the beetle announced that we arrived. They slipped off the beetle. Each one thanking him for a safe ride, and then they all went to their individual rooms. Olivia and I slide off the beetle after they left. We stood in the parking lot, doumbfounded for a few minutes. "What's the matter?" The beetle asks. "Um.. well." I try to find the words. "This is not how you were picturing River Bank?" "Yes!" "That's because it's night time. You really expect everything to be open now?" "I guess I did." The beetle shakes his head. "No. All the fun stuff is closed now. Get some rest, we'll do something in the morning." Olivia bites her lip. "Ok, which one is our room?" The beetle snickers. "You don't have a room reserved." "What about the band? How did they get in?" I ask. "Because I reserved rooms for them days ago.How was I to know you'd join us?" "You're right, but is there any way for us to get a room tonight?" "Main building is that a way. Someone should be up now." The beetle says, pointing his head in the distance. Olivia and I shake our heads and walk to the building.

Same Cabbie

It seemed as if as soon as the singer got off the phone a black beetle showed up. I watched in awe as it landed. A thought creeped in my mind. I wondered if this was the same beetle from before, but I quickly dismissed the idea. It seemed unlikely. The beetle apologized profusely to the band. Despite the singer's lack of patience earlier he had no  ill will at this time. Perhaps it's easier sound tough over the phone. At any rate we watched the band climb onto the beetle, almost forgetting we were invited on the tour. "Ain't ya gonna join us?" The drummer asks. The beetle darts his eyes at us. "Wait a minute. I know you." "We know them too!" The rhythm guitarist shouts. "Uh huh. And how do you know them?" The beetle asks.  "They went to our show. They like our music." "And that's enough for you to be instant friends with them?" The beetle asks. "Relax. These people are alright." The singer says. The beetle scoffs. "I'm only doing my job." "And you're doing a very fine job, but I'm telling you you have nothing to worry about." "Fine. They can come, but if they turn out to be psychopaths I won't say I told you so." Olivia and I climb aboard the beetle. "Now, is everyone accounted for?" The beetle asks, annoyed. "Yes, we're all here." I say. "Good. Where to?" The Box Elders shout excitedly at the same time. "To River Bank!"

Where's the Cab?

We waited and waited. Finally, Olivia asked about the cab. To which the singer replied that it was on its way. We waited some more. It seemed as though our ride would never show. "Daryl, did you call him?" The singer asks the bass player. "Of course I did. Why? You don't think I did?" "We've been out here quite a while." "That's just your problem. You never give me any credit. Maybe it's a good thing we're breaking up after all." "Alright. Don't get emotional. I was just asking." We stand in silence for another ten minuets. The singer turns to the bass player again. "Ya didn't call him." "I did!" "Yeah, now I don't believe you." "If you don't believe me then why don't you call him yourself?" "Maybe I will!" The singer takes out a tiny, little cell phone. He dials and walks away. I tried not to listen, but I couldn't help myself. "Where are you?...What are you doing there?.... Yes, it was tonight. How could you forget?... Yeah, yeah, well, get here as soon as you can." The singer hangs up the phone and walks back over to us. "There was a mix up. He'll be here soon."

Outside the Bar

"Fuckin' death metal." Said the drummer of the Box Elders. "You think they'd grow out of that shit." The bass guitarist adds. The singer shakes his head and takes a drag of his cigarette. "This is why we gotta get out." "Because of death metal?" Olivia questions. "Yeah. You saw it. There's way more people out there for their music." "I saw, but just because it's popular doesn't mean it's good." Olivia says. "Yeah, but popular pays the bills." "So, what are you saying? You want to play like them?" Olivia asks. The singer shakes his head. "Fuck no. We've got too much integrity." "Then what are you saying?" I wonder. The singer shrugs. "I don't know, but we all agreed this is our last tour." There is a moment of silence. "Well, just because this is your last tour, it doesn't mean you can't have fun." I say. "We know that. We're gonna go out on a bang." The drummer shouts. "Yeah, fuck this place. This town is stale." The bass player adds. "We're gonna have so much more fun at River Bank." The singer says and he turns to us. "You should join us." "I don't see why not. We don't have anything planned, but you're not planning on driving are you?" I ask. "No, no worries. We got a cab. We got a cab. He should be here any minuet."

"Band's Breaking Up"

Olivia and I grabbed a drink with the Box Elders. Initially, I was thrilled to be invited for a drink with the band. Then, however, reality sunk in. I realized that they were four very unhappy creatures. They barely acknowledged me or Olivia. They all more or less sat in their own individual islands of melancholy. Perhaps wondering if indeed the best years of their lives were long since gone. It seemed odd to me that the band that was so full of life could barely utter a word now. I suppose it was all a well crafted act earlier. As if he could hear my thoughts, the singer leaned over to me. "The band's breaking up." "What? Why?" Olivia says. "Can't do this anymore. We're getting too old." "You guys don't look old." Olivia assures. The singer smiles. "You're sweet, but as a band you gotta know when it's time to stop." "So, you're really breaking up?" I say. The singer nods. " 'Fraid so, but at least you guys got see one of our last shows." "One of your last?" Olivia questions. "Yep. We decided a while ago we wanted to quit. The low turnout and lousy pay tonight is what put us over the edge." "What did they pay you tonight?" It was a question that I was surprised jumped out of my mouth. The singer gave me a sideways glance. "Didn't your mother mother ever tell to not ask such questions?" "She did." The singer sighs. "If you must know, it was  $50." "That doesn't sound too bad." I say."No, not individually. I mean we only got $50. Which is roughly about $12 split four ways." "That's fucked up." Olivia says. "Tell me about it. But the real sad part is when I was younger that seemed like a lot of money. Now I know it's nothing. Oh well." The singer raises his drink and takes a swig. A second later an intentionally loud, distorted feedback blast throughout the bar. We all turn around to see a particular scary group of cockroaches taking the stage. The singer talks into the microphone. "We are Infest and we will ahhhhhhhhh." His words dissolve into nonsensical, pained, wailing. The music is fast and aggressive. The box eldder singer turns in his seat. His throws some money down on the bar. He shouts "Fuck this noise" as loudly as can over the music. He storms out of the bar followed closely by his band mates. Olivia and I , not wanting to stick around, follow his band mates out the bar.

The Box Elders

The concert didn't start till late at night. Almost midnight to be precise, but because Olivia and I were there since the early afternoon we didn't have to pay the minimum  $10 entrance fee. It was something that I didn't want to question nor brag about. Perhaps the flea' s thinking was that I'd end up drinking and eating twice that amount during my stay. At any rate, I was overjoyed when the band finally took the stage. They were a quartet of boxelder bugs. One drummer, one bass guitarist, one rhythm guitarist, and one tall, spindly singer. Without saying any introduction they went right into a rocking cover of the Boxtops' "The Letter." Followed directly by "Sweet Cream Ladies." "After that they did The Animals' "House of the Rising Sun." Then the Kinks' "You Really Got Me." It was one 60's hit after another. Maybe I was a little drunk, but I was really enjoying them. I didn't want them to stop, but alas all good things must end. They ended their set by bringing things down a bit. Their last song was the Boxtops' "A Whither Shade of Grey." A perfect bookend I thought. "Thank you. We're the Box Elders." The singer said after he finished his song. Unfortunately, I think the only other person in room who shared my enthusiasm for the band was Olivia. I clapped loudly and obnoxiously. I think if I wasn't two sheets to the wind I would have embarrassed myself, but the band seemed to appreciate it. The singer came back to our table a few minutes later to thank us for the support. "You guys were amazing." Olivia says. "Thank you." The singer says humbly. "No, you don't get it. You guys were great. You were fun, and that's what we need. Fun." I add. "Well, we try to be fun." "I was really enjoying your music ." Olivia says. "Thanks. I'm glad."  "I just don't get what's wrong with everyone else." I say. The singer shrugs. "I'm not surprised. We're the opening act. People usually aren't as warm for the opener." "You're the opening act?" Olivia says, surprised. "Yeah, and it looks like we have some time before the main act takes stage. Care for a drink with me and my mates?" I look to Olivia. I could tell she was thinking the same thing I was. That one more drink might not be the best idea, but brush with celebrity, however small or local it may be is hard to turn down.Olivia smiled big and bright. "We'd love to."

The Flea's Bar

We entered a dark, rundown bar. Most the tables were overturned and the only inhabitant was a flea behind the bar. He had an eyepatch and was polishing a glass mug with a dirty rag. He glared at us with his one working eye. "Not too late to turn around." I whisper to Olivia. "What do you want?" The flea shouts. "We were told this is a good bar." Olivia says. "That so?" "Yeah." The flea shakes its head. "Alright. Take a seat where you want. I'll be with you in a moment." Olivia and I take a seat at one of the few tables that isn't flipped over. However, as soon as we sit down I notice it's wobbly. I place sugar packets under the table leg to correct the problem, but it's still wobbly. "It's fine. Don't worry about it." Olivia says. I lean in. "Would this be considered a dive bar?" Olivia shakes her head. "Rundown,yes, but not a dive bar." "What does it need to be considered a dive bar?" I ask. Olivia smiles. "Younger, hipper, people latching onto it." I lean back. The flea walks up to our table. "Drinks?" I look up at him. "I'll have a Guiness." The flea stares at me blankly. "He'll have the house special, and so will I." Olivia says. The flea nods and walks away. "You know, we're not in Kansas anymore." She reminds. "Yeah, I know." The flea comes back a moment later with two mud brown drinks in dirty mugs. I try not to wince as I take the drinks from him. "Anything else?" He asks. "Yes, we were told there is good theatre around here." Olivia says. The flea shrugs. "There might be. I don't know anything about that." "Well, would you know what fun things there is to do around here?" She asks. "Most the grasshoppers are hybernateing, so that kinda limits the amount of fun you can have, but we are having a show here later." "A show? Like a band?" "Yeah, a concert." Olivia lights up. "That would be fun." "It doesn't start till much later." "That's fine, we can wait."